I generally try to keep an upbeat and happy mood around blogville (such a funny and quirky ville, I tell ya). But I'm not going to lie, things have been quite shaky here on my side of the world since January of last year. I was never quite the fan of list-making but I've been quite keen of doing that as of late. Aside from traveling back and forth to the East Coast every 3 weeks, I moved from nowhere land to LA to be closer to my family and my boyfriend or I mean, ex-boyfriend, no, what I meant is the jerk that broke my heart. Oh, I think you get the point. I kept the break-up on the extreme down-low because, well, those aren't the things that you read about on fashion blogs. After much thought, however, I thought, well who the heck decided that this was a fashion blog anyway? Who made that rule? The material you see on my blog is raw- things that make me happy (cooking, my dog, movies, arts & crafts- the list is endless!), and superficial things (shoes, clothes, and things that make the world go 'round) are, like it or not, the a big part of the world that we live in.

I decided to travel to New York and Pittsburgh on my own this time to have some quiet time to clear my mind. To think about what went wrong. What did I do wrong? I invested 6 years of my life to this relationship which turned into dust in a matter of days. You know, the irony of all this is, before I met Jack, I had a boyfriend named Daniel. He was quite the charmer and very good looking (let me just add that he was not aZn...also adding that this disclaimer is nothing against aZnS). He always made sure to make me happy by slipping in love notes in my jackets and pants. We'd go to the beach and have picnics. The kind of love that we shared was like the love we see on TV. High school love. Towards the end of our 3 year courtship, I felt like I was quite frequently the one wearing the pants and broke it off when I met Jack. Poor Daniel, I broke his heart in pieces. He called, text messaged, emailed, visited me at work, instant messaged me- did anything possible to get me back but I ignored him because I knew that we just were not going to work out. I also knew that karma would come get me, and, sadly, I was unmistakeably right about that.

After a short visit to memory lane, I can't quite stop but think to myself, what happened to me? When did I start criticizing others, poking fun of others at my own expense of ultimate unhappiness just for that minute of laughter? Was it worth it? Did I ever think that I was better at something than someone else? If so, whatever was wrong with me to ever think that?